Vigils Reading – St John XXIII

THE SPIRITUAL TESTAMENT

AND LAST WISHES

of St Pope John XXIII5

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On the point of presenting myself before the One and Triune Lord who

created me, redeemed me, chose me to be his priest and bishop, and covered me

with unending graces, I entrust my poor soul to His mercy; I humbly ask pardon

for my sins and deficiencies. I offer Him the little good, although petty and

imperfect, that with His aid I have succeeded in doing, for His glory, for the

service of Holy Church, for the edification of my brethren, begging Him finally

to receive me, like a good and kind Father, with His Saints into eternal

happiness.

I profess once again with all my heart my entire Christian and Catholic

faith, my adherence and subjection to the Holy Apostolic and Roman Church,

and my complete devotion and obedience to her August Head, the Supreme

Pontiff, whom it was my great honor to represent for long years in various

regions of the East and West, who at the end chose me to come to Venice as

Cardinal and Patriarch, and whom I have always followed with sincere

affection, aside from and above any dignity conferred upon me. The sense of my

own littleness and nothingness has always been my good companion, keeping

me humble and calm, and making me employ myself to the best of my ability in

a constant exercise of obedience and charity for souls and for the interests of the

Kingdom of Jesus, my Lord and my all. To Him be all glory; for me and for my

merit, His mercy.

I ask pardon of those whom I have unwittingly offended, of all to whom I

have not been a source of edification. I feel that I have nothing to forgive anyone,

for all who have known and dealt with me – including those who have offended

me, scorned me, held me in bad esteem (with good reason, for that matter), or

have been a source of affliction for me – I regard solely as brothers and

benefactors, to whom I am grateful and for whom I pray and always will pray.

Born poor, but of honorable and humble people, I am particularly happy

to die poor, having given away, in accord with the various demands and

circumstances of my simple and modest life, for the benefit of the poor and of

Holy Church that had nurtured me, all that came into my hands – which was

little enough as a matter of fact – during the years of my priesthood and

episcopacy. Outward appearances of ease and comfort often veiled hidden

thorns of distressing poverty and kept me from giving with all the largess I

would have liked. I thank God for this grace of poverty which I vowed in my

youth, poverty of spirit as a priest of the Sacred Heart, and real poverty…

As I face death, I recall each and every one – those who preceded me in

taking the final step, those who will survive me and who will follow me. May

they pray for me. I will repay them from Purgatory or from Paradise, where I

hope to be received. I repeat it once again, not because of my merits, but because

of the mercy of the Lord. At the moment for saying farewell, or better still,

arrivederci, I once more remind everyone of what counts most in life: blessed

Jesus Christ, His Holy Church, His Gospel; and in the Gospel, above all, the

Pater noster in the spirit and heart of Jesus and the Gospel, the truth and

goodness, the goodness meek and kind, active and patient, victorious and

unbowed.