Vigils Reading

THE GENTLENESS OF CHARITY

From “The Mirror of Charity” by St Aelred of Rievaulx

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Let anyone who finds it pleasant to enjoy his friend see to it that he enjoy

him in the Lord, not in the world or in pleasure of the flesh, but in joyfulness of

spirit. But, you ask, what does it mean to enjoy ‘in the Lord’? About the Lord, the

apostle Paul said: By God he has been made for us wisdom, sanctification, and

justice. Since the Lord is wisdom, sanctification, and justice, to find enjoyment

in the Lord is to find enjoyment in wisdom, sanctification, and justice. By

wisdom worldly vanity is banished, by sanctification the vileness of the flesh is

forsworn, and by justice all flattery and fawning are checked.

Then it is charity, if it comes, as the apostle says, from a pure heart, a clear

conscience, and unfeigned faith. A pure heart accepts wisdom, modesty calms

the conscience and unfeigned faith adorns justice. There are those who take

enjoyment in vain and ludicrous things, in worldly pomp and mundane

spectacles, in the pursuit of vanity, and in reveling in falsehood. They do not

enjoy themselves in wisdom, nor in him who is the strength of God and the

wisdom of God. Others, although not worse, are certainly more vile. In them

there is almost nothing human. Obscene depravity has transformed them into

beasts who find enjoyment in self-indulgent banqueting and impure desires.

Since they do not enjoy themselves in the sanctification which consists of the

gentleness of charity, they do not, of course, enjoy the Lord who was made our

sanctification by God.

There are others who take enjoyment in flattery, patting each other on the

back and conniving with each other. While taking care not to offend one

another, they incur each other’s ruin because they do not enjoy themselves in

the liberty of justice or in the Lord.

If our mutual exchange of words is delightful, let our talk therefore be

about our habits and about Scripture. Let us now grieve together over the

miseries of the world, now rejoice together in the hope of future happiness. Let

us now refresh one another by confiding our mutual secrets, now long together

for the blessed vision of Jesus, and for heavenly well-being.

If we relax our tense spirits with some pleasant and less lofty subjects, as

is sometimes useful, let these moments of relaxation be filled with rectitude and

free of frivolity. Although these subjects may not be weighty, let them never lack

constructiveness. Let us enjoy one another in sanctification, so that each may

know how to possess his vessel—that is to say, his own body—in sanctification

and honor, and not in the passion of desire. Let us take enjoyment in justice, so

we may mutually encourage one another in the spirit of freedom. Let us correct

one another, knowing that wounds from a friend are better than an enemy’s

deceitful kisses.