Vigils Reading
A reading from
WILLIAM OF ST THIERRY
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In order that your solitude may not appall you and that you may dwell the
more safely in your cell three guardians have been assigned to you: God, your
conscience and your spiritual father. To God you owe devotion and the entire
gift of yourself; to your conscience the respect which will make you ashamed to
sin in its presence; to your spiritual father the obedience of charity and recourse
in everything.
In addition, to make you grateful to me, I will add a fourth and provide
you with a monitor for as long as you are small and have not learned to keep the
presence of God before your mind.
If you will take my advice, you will choose for yourself a man whose life is
such that it will serve as a model to impress upon your heart, one whom you will
so revere that whenever you think of him you will rise up because of the respect
you feel for him and put yourself in order. Think of him as if he were present and
let the charity you feel for one another act in you to correct all that needs to be
corrected, while your solitude suffers no infringement of its secret. Let him be
present to you whenever you wish and let him come sometimes when you would
have preferred him to stay away. The thought of his holy severity will make it
seem as if he were rebuking you; the thought of his kindness and goodness will
bring you consolation; the purity and sanctity of his life will set you a good
example.
For you will be driven to correct even all your thoughts, as if they were
open to his gaze and visited by his rebuke, when you consider that he is
watching. So, as the Apostle bids: “Keep guard on yourself” with the greatest
care and, in order to have your eyes always on yourself, turn your gaze away
from all else. The eye is a remarkable instrument of the body – if only it could
see itself as it sees other things. Now the inner eye is enabled to do this. If then it
follows the example of the outward eye and neglects itself, giving its attention to
the affairs of others, it will not be able to return to itself, however much it may
wish to do so.
Give your attention to yourself; you yourself constitute abundant matter
for solicitude for yourself. Shut out also from your outward eyes what you have
grown unaccustomed to see, from your inner eyes what you no longer love, since
nothing so easily reasserts its claims as love, especially in younger and more
tender souls.
Make bold also to be wise at times and desire the better gifts. Be yourself a
parable of edification for yourself. You have one cell outwardly, another within
you. The outward cell is the house in which your soul dwells together with your
body; the inner cell is your conscience and in that it is God who should dwell
with your spirit, he who is more interior to you than all else that is within you.
The door of the outward enclosure is a sign of the guarded door within you, so
that as the bodily senses are prevented from wandering abroad by the outward
enclosure, so the inner senses are kept always within their own domain.
The Golden Epistle – William of St Thierry – Cistercian Fathers Series #12 – Kalamazoo, MI – 1971 – pg 45.11