Vigils Reading – St Elizabeth Ann Seton

DEATH OF A HUSBAND AT CHRISTMAS

From the collected writings of St Elizabeth Ann Seton

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With God for our Portion there is no Prison in high walls and bolts — no

sorrow in the Soul that waits on him tho’ beset with present cares, and gloomy

Prospects… For this freedom I can never be sufficiently thankful, as in my

Williams case, it keeps alive what in his weak State of Body would naturally fail

— and often when he hears me repeat the Psalms of Triumph in God, and read

St. Paul’s faith in Christ with my Whole Soul, it so enlivens his Spirit that he

also makes them his own, and all our sorrows are turned into joy. Oh well may

I love God. Well may my whole soul strive to please him, for what but the strain

of an Angel can ever express what he has done and is constantly doing for me.

While I live, while I have my being in Time and thro’ Eternity let me sing praises

to my God…

Every promise in the Scriptures I could remember and suitable Prayer, I

continually repeated to him which seemed to be <William’s> only relief. When

I stopped to give anything <he would say> “Why do you do it, what do I want,

I want to be in Heaven, pray, pray for my Soul“

…

The hard struggle ceased…a quarter past seven when the dear Soul took

its flight to the blessed exchange it so much longed for… I often asked him when

he could not speak, “You feel my love that you are going to your Redeemer” and

he motioned yes with a look…of Peace. At a quarter past 7 on Tuesday morning

27th December — his Soul was released — and mine from a struggle next to

death…

I had done all — all that tenderest love and duty could do. My head had

not rested for a week. Three days and nights the fatigue had been incessant and

one meal in 24 hours… In all this it is not necessary to dwell on the mercy and

consoling presence of my dear Redeemer, for no mortal strength could support

what I experienced…

My William often asked me if I felt assured that he would be accepted and

pardoned, and I always tried to convince him that where the soul was so humble

and sincere as his, and submission to God’s will so uniform as his had been

throughout his trial, that it became sinful to doubt one moment of his reception

through the merits of his Redeemer…

The night before his death praying earnestly for him that his pardon

might be sealed in Heaven and his transgressions blotted out… I continued on

my knees and leaned my head on the chair by which I knelt and insensibly lost

myself… I had a dream… A little angel at some distance held open a division in

the sky. A large black Bird like an eagle flew towards me and flapped its wings

round and made everything dark. The angel looked as if it held up the division

waiting for something the Bird came for. And so alone from every friend on

Earth, walking the valley of the Shadow of death we had sweet comfort even in

our dreams — while Faith convinced us they were realities.

4 Elizabeth Bayley Seton. Collected Writings: Volume I – Correspondence and Journals 1793-1808. Ed. Regina Bechtle, S.C.

and Judith Metz, S.C. New City Press: Hyde Park, NY, 2000. 265, 274-276.11