Vigils Reading

A reading from “The Mirror of Charity” by

ST AELRED OF RIEVAULX

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Now let us examine quite carefully the measure to be observed in natural

attachments. Just as it is clearly impossible not to allow this attachment, so not

to follow it is the summit of virtue. No one has ever hated himself, and yet,

“anyone who comes to me”, said the Savior, “and does not hate his own life

cannot be my disciple”. Likewise, “anyone who comes to me and does not hate

his father and mother cannot be my disciple”.

The apostle, on the other hand, says: anyone who does not provide for his

relatives, especially if they live with him, has disowned the faith and is worse

than an unbeliever. What then? Should master and disciple, servant and Lord,

very Truth and Truth’s friend, be thought to have had contrary points of view?

Far from it!

Between these two loves about which we have spoken above, a distinction

must be made: the one is according to attachment; the other according to

reason. It is natural for a person to have an attachment for himself and his own

relatives, but one ought not form his love according to attachment. It ought

rather to be according to reason. This attachment was meant when the apostle

said, “no one has ever hated his own flesh”. Yet love according to attachment is

forbidden on the authority of the Savior himself, who said, “anyone who comes

to me and does not hate his father and mother, yes, and even his own life, cannot

he my disciple”. Love according to reason was indicated when the apostle said,

“anyone who does not provide for his relatives, especially if they live with him,

has disowned the faith and is worse than an unbeliever”.

Love according to attachment was denounced when Paul, foretelling ills

to come, said among other things: There will be persons who will love

themselves. The following words teach us that here he understood this as love

according to attachment: For there will be persons who love themselves, who

will be avaricious, proud, who will love pleasure rather than God. Attachment

always suggests things that are pleasant and soft. It willingly embraces what is

delightful and tender, what is pleasurable and delicate. But anything arduous

and harsh, anything that goes against self-will, it flees in utter dread and avoids.

Hence, following this attachment through is perverse love; it strips a

person of his humanness and vests him in animal form, destroying in a way and

hiding every trace of reason, of integrity, and ultimately, of usefulness. This love

is characteristic of beasts, and excusable in children, because reason has not

been bestowed on the former and is dormant in the latter.