Vigils Reading
A reading from
WILLIAM OF ST THIERRY
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In order that your solitude may not appall you and that you may dwell the
more safely in your cell three guardians have been assigned to you: God, your
conscience and your spiritual father. To God you owe devotion and the entire
gift of yourself; to your conscience the respect which will make you ashamed to
sin in its presence; to your spiritual father the obedience of charity and recourse
in everything…
I will add a fourth… If you will take my advice, you will choose for yourself
a man whose life is such that it will serve as a model to impress upon your heart,
one whom you will so revere that whenever you think of him you will rise up
because of the respect you feel for him and put yourself in order. Think of him as
if he were present and let the charity you feel for one another act in you to
correct all that needs to be corrected, while your solitude suffers no
infringement of its secret. Let him be present to you whenever you wish and let
him come sometimes when you would have preferred him to stay away. The
thought of his holy severity will make it seem as if he were rebuking you; the
thought of his kindness and goodness will bring you consolation; the purity and
sanctity of his life will set you a good example. For you will be driven to correct
even all your thoughts, as if they were open to his gaze and visited by his rebuke,
when you consider that he is watching.
So, as the Apostle bids: “Keep guard on yourself” with the greatest care
and, in order to have your eyes always on yourself, turn your gaze away from all
else… Shut out also from your outward eyes what you have grown
unaccustomed to see, from your inner eyes what you no longer love, since
nothing so easily reasserts its claims as love, especially in younger and more
tender souls.
Make bold also to be wise at times and desire the better gifts. Be yourself a
parable of edification for yourself. You have one cell outwardly, another within
you. The outward cell is the house in which your soul dwells together with your
body; the inner cell is your conscience and in that it is God who should dwell
with your spirit, he who is more interior to you than all else that is within you.
The door of the outward enclosure is a sign of the guarded door within you, so
that as the bodily senses are prevented from wandering abroad by the outward
enclosure so the inner senses are kept always within their own domain…
Let the outward cell shelter you, not hide you away; its purpose is not to
let you sin without being seen but to enable you to live in greater safety. For you
do not know, you, its untaught inmate, what you owe to your cell if you fail to
consider not only how you are cured of your vices in it but also that you are
preserved from quarreling with people outside. You are ignorant also of the
respect which you owe to your conscience if you do not in your cell experience
the grace of the Holy Spirit and the joy of interior sweetness.