Vigils Reading

ON HESITATION IN PRAYER

From “The Commendation of Faith” by Baldwin of Forde6 ◊◊◊

The fact that the righteous are sometimes ignorant of what it is proper to ask for is clearly shown by what Paul says to the Romans: “The Spirit helps our infirmity, for we do not know what it is proper to pray for. But the Spirit itself asks for us with ineffable groanings”… The righteous do not know what it is proper to pray for, for when they ask to be relieved from need or tribulation or to have temptation removed, they do not realize [what positive] fruits will come from need or tribulation, or the result of temptation. They do not know what is more useful for them for salvation: whether to have or to lack the things they desire.

Nevertheless, since they have two wills – one which is weak and the other powerful; one according to the flesh which lusts against the spirit and the other according to the spirit which lusts against the flesh – a particular form of prayer has been instituted in which they say to God: ‘Nevertheless, not as I will, but as you [will]. This powerful will, which is according to the spirit, and by which we wish to put the will of God before the will which is according to the flesh, is what the Holy Spirit urges and brings about,… inflames our hearts in the fervour of holy desire, and makes us ask for those things that please him and which are beneficial for us…

When we ask from God wisdom, charity, humility, patience, peace of mind – things we should certainly ask for – then even though we know what we seek, we still do not know whether what we seek is the right thing for us to have or for him to give… In such a confusion of uncertainty and ignorance, when the righteous do not know… for what they ought properly to ask, when they have only the certainty of their own weakness and do not have full confidence in their own righteousness, then, even though they trust resolutely in the mercy of God, they still tremble because of their frailty and they hesitate, nor do they hope without fear, just as they do not tremble without hope. But if they so fear, how is it that they do not despair? If they so hope, how is it that they do not relax through such a great [sense of] security? When they pray, they are placed between hope and fear: how, then, do they ask in faith without hesitation? [The answer is that] they do not hesitate in that faith which, in all things and through all things, they do not doubt to be true…

Someone who doubts focusses a great deal of attention either on the power of God or on his will. The man who brought his son to Jesus seemed to doubt [God’s] power when, according to Mark, he says: ‘If you can do anything, help us and have mercy on us.’ Jesus said to him: ‘If you can believe, all things are possible for the one who believes. He said: ‘Lord, I do believe: help my unbelief.”… The leper doubted his will but not his power, when, according to Matthew, he said to Jesus: ‘Lord, if you will, you can make me clean’, and at once he heard: ‘I will; be clean.’ Note that he who doubted only his will received the assurance of his will with the grace of a cure. But he who doubted his power and said ‘If you can’, straightaway heard this said to him: ‘If you can believe, all things are possible for the one who believes.’ In this way it is shown that the grace of the mercy he sought depended on his faith in the omnipotence of the one whom he had doubted could do anything in his particular case